Dwarf Fortress almost made me fail a few courses in undergrad.
That is a game that redefines the concept of fun.
If you don’t gotta consult the reference books regularly, are you even enjoying yourself?
I bought a second monitor just to have the wiki open at all times.
An epic fight with trogdor.
Then, as an adventurer, you beat Trogdor by throwing handfuls of water at it
I have legit weaponized kittens as projectile anti-siege bioweapons using drawbridges as catapults.
It is amazing that in zero words that comic encapsulates nearly everything about Dwarf Fortress.
This is the only game that made me regret wasting time eating IRL because I needed both hands for designating jobs.
If that comic defines what dwarf games and dwarf fortress plays like, then am I a dwarf for exclusively playing indie roguelikes and roguelites?
I’m tempted to put Eve Online into the “Elf Video Game” category, because the UI could, to quote Yahtzee, “only be more unintuitive if it was at the bottom of a fucking well.” It doesn’t really meet the other categories there. It kinda hits “Halfling Video Games,” with the sheer politics involved in that game.
Factorio is solidly a “Dwarven Video Game.”
The Eve Online UI is perfectly intuitive. There is simply no other way of providing the level of information needed in a different format than lots of tables.
only thing missing is an SQL prompt.
We found the elf.
Eve is 100% halfling game.
I suppose you have an HOA if you’re in a renter corp, but seriously just join a good alliance.
Turtles all the way down.
Zany uberviolent team shooters about bugs sounds a whole lot like Deep Rock Galactic.
Or its weirder, older cousin, Earth Defense Force
To save our mother Earth from any alien attack!
From vicious giant insects who have once again come back!
I interpreted ‘bugs’ as ‘glitches’ rather than creepy crawlies.
There’s also the newish Starship Troopers: Extermination
Goblins are just juvenile dwarves.
Tabaxi video games: Open world survival crafting rpg with a million different game mechanics. Bugs out the ass because the developers kept getting distracted by a piece of string or some other random bullshit. Ends on a cliffhanger because they ran out of time to finish the story. Robust modding community by necessity.
So. Starfield then
Nah, even the modding community declared that a lost cause.
Skyrim.
No matter how tangled the mess, it’s still a call of yarn, after all. 🤩
edit: I’m leaving it as is.
Palworld then
ROCK AND STONE, MOTHERFUCKERS!
WHEN YOU ROCK AND STONE, YOU’RE NEVER ALONE!
IF YOU DON’T ROCK AND STONE, YOU AIN’T GOIN’ HOME!
Did i hear a Rock and Stone?
The factory must grow
The city must survive
The magma must flow (downstairs through the entirety of the fortress)
Dragon games are oldschool play-by-mail grand strategy that no one alive has actually claimed to play but the crustiest of oldbeards recall their uncle playing at some point.
strike the earth motherfuckers, I just built a computer using nothing but water gates and Armok’s love
What sort of games would Kobolds make? Because I can definitely see them making From the Depths
Kobold Space Program
You know, a character swap and making everything look rusty and recycled and I think you got yourself a grand mod there.
That could also double as Orky Speish Program. Just paint the rocket red and it’ll go faster.
The safety program makes sense if it was designed by a kobold…
Infinite play games that focus on collecting random shit for the highest score without any discernable benefit from doing so 'cept “bigger number heheh…”
Something like Cookie Clicker?
Too polished, Cookie Clicker’s a gnome game.
A kobold-made cookie clicker would only have 3 tiers of buildings and it wouldn’t be a cookie. Probably some kind of tasty beetle I dunno I don’t live in a mudhole.
Presentable Money
Sounds like “Achievement Unlocked” would be something they’d make
ever hear of Bad Rats?
Uber religious knockoffs of other popular games with a reverence for dragons and a prevailing theme of self-loathing
I think “Totally Accurate Battle Simulator”
Untitled Goose Game
This
I used to play many orc flash games in the past. I still do when I want to relieve the past.
Never thought I’d play side by side with an orc.
The music always slaps.
I like team-building isometric RPGs with turn-based combat (I miss you so much Fallout 1 and 2!)
What does that make me?
Old!
I already knew that!
Hahahahaha I’m right there with ya pal 😅
I’m very into base building games in general.
I think it started with Command and Conquer, and blossomed from there.
I’m currently playing valheim and having no fucking clue what I’m doing, but I’m enjoying myself.
My colonists on mars, Rim world, settlers in fo4, and the DRG dwarves will have to wait.
And I want to try out Ixion? but my laptop sucks so I’ll have to wait until I get a desktop or something.
Rimworld
Against the Storm
Timberborn
Valheim like you said
Satisfactory
Tried timberborn and against the storm, they’re good but not for me.
Satisfactory is a good one but my laptop overheats even when I have it on a fan so I gave up on it.
Satisfactory performance seems to have got much worse in update 8
And to think it got several performance updates back when Josh was making all kinds zany shit, like the conveyor belt-nado, right beside the conveyor mesh (look up Let’s Game it Out on YT, even if you don’t care about the game, it’s fucking worth it)
I remember the Beltnado!
What ultimately made me try the game was the tube launcher thing you can put in a circle, surrounding it with other tubes, to speed yourself up to some insane amount and at the last layer it straightens and points upward to launch you some crazy distance across the world.
Maybe someday I can make a nice laid out base, but I’m a big fan of spaghetti.
…you really gonna throw out a teaser like that without giving us a list of corresponding games??
You got counter strike source
I can’t tell if counter strike would be a human or hobgoblin video game.
Not too familiar with jrpgs, my best suggestion is that you’d probably have to combine Tactics Ogre (for the hour long fights) with something else
Basebuilding strategy fps with tensile strength of…
minus the FPS, this is just dwarf fortress
dwarven rhythm games have supply line minigames
I’m pretty sure this is a reference to a specific game but can’t remember much about it
Mortals cannot comprehend dwarven grand strategy games
definitely the campaign for north africa (or any other game by Simulations Publications)
halfling games: I’ve got nothing
goblin games: the gacha screams “any online card game”, and the moba should be easy to find too. Left as an exercise to the reader.
orc game: I’m thinking this is about 10% of the games on newgrounds. You’ll find these amongst general flash game collections for sure
The first sentence for goblin games is Hades. The second is EDF.
…Hades isn’t a gatcha or “collectathon” though.
collectathon
Spoken like an Alpha Warden.
Lol what?? I don’t think either of those are accurate.
EDF has my vote for a goblin game
EDF?
Chikyuu Boueigun, or Earth Defense Force, is a series of low-budget horde shooters developed by Sandlot and published by D3 Publisher. In each game, the earth has been invaded by aliens, who deploy such B-movie tropes as giant insects, flying saucers, huge combat robots, giant green men, and godzillas against humanity. In most games, you play a normal infantryman. In 4.1 and 5, you can choose between normal infantryman, a slow-but-strong power-armour soldier, a fast-but-fragile jetpack girl, or the guy who calls in airstrikes. In any case, you acquire new and stronger weapons in a sort of “gacha” system; slain enemies occasionally drop crates that contain one random weapon, and you won’t find out what it is until the mission ends. There’s a lot of weapon variety, and you choose 2 weapons to bring with you into each mission, so there’s some good fun to be had exploring for synergistic loadouts.
The story is absurd, hammy B-movie fare, written and dubbed with a lot of heart. Most of the games are 4-player coop. It’s one of my favourite serieses of all time. I’d recommend starting at 5, because it’s available on Steam, it has the most QoL (it’s one of those series where each new game feels like the previous game, just… more and better) and they reboot the chronology every odd game anyway so you’re not missing out on anything much. And also because it has aliens who look exactly like humans! 🐸
Grew up on the SNES and the only EDF I could think of was… Earth Defense Force. But apparently a different game by the same name.
You just brought me WAY back lol.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Poh_C9hrsMM&ab_channel=PEG
I played it too as a kid. Yep! Totally unrelated, just convergent evolution. The Japanese armed forces are called the JSDF; Japan’s Self-Defense Force (because after WWII, part of their surrender included agreeing to disband their army, so they instead created a Self-Defense Force that’s deeefinitely not an army). So clearly, the guys who protect the whole Earth are the Earth Defense Force!
it has aliens who look exactly like humans! 🐸
It has two eyes and a mouth! I can’t shoot it!
“They look just like us!”
Nah, the Orc game would be cozy games because it’s about taking a break from the usual fair for your society.
Korog be coming home from a day crushing human skulls to play a game about owning a small farm and suddenly having a box of corgi puppies left on your doorstep to take care of, sold with a weighted blanket to burrito yourself in while playing for the best immersed experience.
Says you. Tax Simulator, baybeeee!
I have been audited by the IRS
I would commit petty crimes to have a halfling video game
Never played it, but Strange Horticulture sounds like what you’re looking for.
