I’ve been on HRT for about 6 weeks now and I’m pretty sure I’m at female levels. Got a late start at 29 and I still strongly doubt that I’m even trans and should be doing this (seriously, my story is a weird one I think). I would quite welcome being cis because that would mean I don’t have to upend my life and essentially start over under 10x more difficult conditions. I considered myself agender for a long time and maybe I am.

Before HRT I considered myself very much vers. I do understand that severe bottom dysphoria is not needed to be trans, and I intended to do maintenance to retain my ability to top. Now that I’m actually into it, my feelings have changed.

I’ve read that a full erection once a day is needed to reliably retain full function, but that sounds quite unpleasant to me now? I just don’t want to do it, and I don’t really care if I never use my genitals to top again. I’m also finding myself more welcoming to the idea of SRS.

  • Is it due to the nature of HRT and changing sex drive? I mean, duh, estrogen
  • Is it due to repression breaking? Was I masking dysphoria before?
  • Is it because I have read and internalized that this is how I should feel, in some people’s opinion, and I am conforming to that?

I don’t think it’s really the last one - I also understand I have more sexual/dating prospects if I’m vers, and I think I kinda care about that more than some fringe viewpoints about validity

  • kluczyczka (she/her)@discuss.tchncs.deEnglish
    3·
    8 hours ago

    the perceived usefullness of my configuration has for sure and rapidly gone down through hrt (4+ month now). but it also started at a low level. i had come to understand a lot of my past behaviour as some kind of dysphoria before hrt. but still i am unsure if i want surgery. my dysphoria has never shown itself in me actively disliking my parts. it is just nothing i want others to interact with. i think it’d be rather boring if they did.

    so yeah i guess at least your first and second point might be factors. esp. my sex drive did change through E. it got even more of a whole body thing, i wasn’t ever fixated on genital interaction, but still i feel it drifting away from that. the ability to top became even less of an priority for me. as for your 3rd one: be assured, i know a lot of girls that do not go for surgery. i maybe won’t either. i am still trying to form a solid opinion in therapy, bc i can’t tell how i feel abt any of this. but do whatever you need. qnd only that. :)