Props to this person for never washing their mouth off their friend’s blood. I’m sure they had the chance to do it, but chose to walk all over the hospital with their mouth covered in blood so that the nurse could see it, otherwise the joke wouldn’t have landed.
You ever try to get blood out in a hurry?
I mean, obviously this is the internet and nothing is real, but it’s not impossible that they still had some blood on them in the frenzy to get to the hospital.
I don’t know how hospitals work in the US (assuming that OP is a US citizen, because that’s what we do on the internet), but where I come from, determining the cause of an injury is very important to decide on an effective treatment. Bites in particular are very nasty and can lead to a lot of scary complications (including human bites!).
There’s no way in hell the nurse just said “yeah ok got it fam” and went along with her day like it wasn’t important.
And maybe I’m too jaded, but I read “we also got engaged” and my mind automatically added “and everyone clapped” at the end of the sentence lol
There’s no way in hell the nurse just said “yeah ok got it fam” and went along with her day like it wasn’t important.
I suspect that, if true, it was clarified further down the line before treatment. Or, considering how I’ve been in-and-out of the ER, the nurse just wrote down ‘human bite’ regardless of what the patient claimed lmao.
Like I said. It’s the internet. I’m not saying it’s definitely real. But it’s far from impossible.
She would chart the cause as accurately as she can; whether she also writes down the obvious lie is up to her. Which means she would write down “human bite”; not because it’s best for the patient, not because of liability, but because every other staff member (nurses and doctors included) would laugh at her if she didn’t. Nurses got a pecking order, and writing down obvious nonsense in a patient’s chart is a good way to drop ranks.
As someone that has worked in healthcare and knows what ER staff see every day:
Lol, bet?
I mean, there is plenty of time to lick lips on the way to the hospital.
Use water? It takes 2 seconds to wash blood off of skin with plain ol water.
LOL, that’s amazing.
Also, d4 is the damage of a dagger, which is a weapon made specifically to kill people and has a ~25% chance of killing a commoner (who typically has 4 hp) in one hit with just the rolled damage.
Exactly. I mean it’s a cute story but I 100% still thinks that is 1d4 damage lol
I’m not looking to get married, but keep in mind it’s a Barbarian bite. So the biter’s half-feral and accustomed to gnawing on raw meat.
I’d give it a flat 1HP, if that. Unless you get me in the neck, I doubt any human bite would take 25% of this commoners HP.
Thing is, if you’re trying to bite someone to death the neck is the most natural target (vs. bending down to take a chunk out of their stomach or trying to open the veins in the arms). The difficulty is more in actually getting in range, which realistically would get down to grappling in a fight.
Do commoners not go down to -9? I don’t think any session I’ve ever played bothered with caring about the peasantry, lmao
NPCs and monsters automatically die at zero HP in DmD 5th and the editions prior that I was the DM for. There was a reminder that the DM could choose to let them go under, but the default was death on zero for non-player characters and monsters.
Just imagine tracking death saving throws for every NPC and weak monsters…
Not since 3.5.
You have to stab him with a dagger too and see which is worse.
You have to do it many times to weigh the average
I’m loving the comments.
Half of them are discussing the game mechanics and damage of the bite.
The other half are sharing the feelings of affection that apparently came from being bitten.That’s just kinky with extra steps
Pretty sure that’s what the nurse assumed.
I’m not confident the nurse was wrong!
Transcription:
Anônimo disse
I actually did bite my dm with explicit consent. because I was trying to argue that a ranger/barbarian’s bite would be d6+Strength Modifier. and not d4+Strength Modifier. and he was like lmao human bites aren’t even that strong. and I said bet. and he said well bite me then as strong as an 18 attack roll would be (the prison guard had 14AC btw) and we had to stop the game because he had to go get stitches.
also he didn’t wanna say he let himself get bit to win an argument that he lost so badly he’s in the emergency room, so he was like “a rat did it” and the nurse turns her head 12 degrees to the left and sees my bloody mouth. and goes “yeah okay that happens”
and we did get the barbarian bite attack to be d6+Strength Modifier. I’m also now engaged to this guy and this campaign I get to be the dm!
probablybadrpgideas Absolute rollercoaster, but congrats on the engagement - Paper
Everyone knows a bite attack’s damage is just strength + successes rolled lethal damage. Agg if you are some kinda freak.
