• MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
    3·
    6 hours ago

    counterpoint, the other counter is more fun and has the rock that you like to cuddle on it

    failing that, you will be punished most severely with the deadliest punishment of all: forehead kisses!

  • tomiant@piefed.socialEnglish
    7·
    10 hours ago

    “Change my mind”

    “Psych! Nothing will change my mind!”

  • ᓚᘏᗢ@piefed.socialEnglish
    17·
    12 hours ago

    This is probably the best use of this meme template that I’ve seen.

  • LillyPip@lemmy.caEnglish
    261·
    15 hours ago

    I don’t plant my bare anus on my counter, so neither will you.

      • YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.todayEnglish
        3·
        11 hours ago

        With the nozzle unscrewed almost all the way for that laser jet. I have to refill my bottle once a month with Furryosa. But after I get her, thirty seconds later, without fail, every single time, she comes and gets all affectionate making me feel guilty.

        She knows exactly what she’s doing, little emotional manipulative poopyhead!

        • seathru@quokk.auEnglish
          4·
          10 hours ago

          I’ve found one of the rechargeable air dusters is far more effective. Not all cats are adverse to water, some even like it. But a blast of air will deter all but the stubbornest.

          • MinnesotaGoddam@lemmy.world
            1·
            6 hours ago

            do those compressed air cans work? we’ve got a mean cat out in the yard and i am thinking of building and carrying around a little co2 can/straw dealie to psst at her from long range

          • YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.todayEnglish
            4·
            9 hours ago

            I wonder if the engine whine has anything to do with it. I’ll try with my car vacuum later and report back, for science!

            • seathru@quokk.auEnglish
              4·
              9 hours ago

              I think it’s more the feeling of the air blast. Mo will let me clean him with a vacuum, but runs away at a puff of air. And compressed air from a tank is just as effective. But I figured most people weren’t living in a perpetual remodel and didn’t have that in their kitchen.

              • YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.todayEnglish
                3·
                9 hours ago

                Big lol. I am living in remodel purgatory. But just turning on the compressor is enough to get both of mine to run and hide.

  • YiddishMcSquidish@lemmy.todayEnglish
    2·
    11 hours ago

    Cause I know damn well you’re going to knock over my half drunk bottle of wine!

    • idunnololz@lemmy.world
      4·
      12 hours ago

      My cat once jumped on the counter when I was cutting raw chicken. He stole a piece and I just let him have it… He knows I’m powerless and my threats are empty T_T

      • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
        4·
        11 hours ago

        One time I was sitting in the living room. Kitchen is to my immediate left on the other side of the wall.

        I’m watching tv, and then from in the kitchen I hear a duck. QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK.

        I’m so confused. I don’t have a duck. Why is there randomly a duck in my kitchen at 2am???

        So I jump up, run into the kitchen where I see my cat who turns around like “OH HIIIIII!!!”

        No duck.

        So I start looking in cabnets. In the oven. In the fridge. I walked down the hall and checked the bathroom. I checked the closet.

        I looked everywhere for this duck. I’m not crazy. I heard a duck. It was very close, in the kitchen. I heard it. I know I heard it. Where did it come from??? Where did it go???

        Finally I gave up. My cat just looking at me losing my shit for an hour. Just looking at me like “You ok???”

        So finally I just sat back down on the couch and wondered if I was losing my mind.

        …never did find a duck.

        I know this doesn’t relate to your comment per se, but we’re sharing cat stories. My cat didn’t steal chicken. My cat stole sanity.

      • how_we_burned@lemmy.zip
        4·
        11 hours ago

        Once my father was preparing a 15kg salmon for a big dinner party. The phone rang and he turned away for just a moment.

        Our three cats who had been strategically located around him used this moment to pounce. Working together they had leapt onto the bench and pulled it off.

        With a loud splat he came rushing back to find them merciless attacking the fish.

        (the meat with bite marks was strategically removed, and the cats rejoiced).

        The dog into trouble for not stopping the cats.