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Interspecies sex is what got you into this minotaur mess. It isn’t how you will get out of it.
Clearly you’ve never actually met a bard before. Haven’t you ever wondered where half orcs come from? It’s bards, always bards. Every. Single. Goddamn. Time.
They will Lay your Minotaur
Uuugh, so they’re sending the bard again!
Feats of great strength and cunting
:3
Will they bring glory to me and my house?
They will have sex with your house