Sounds like you’re making good progress! I’m happy about all the good things, especially how (apparently) well you are dealing with the setback regarding your mom. Your post radiates confidence and optimism, which is inspiring to be ❤️
I feel like I’m in the wrong place to ask, but you’re setting up a homelab computer for self hosting stuff? Awesome! I just fixed mine.
Thanks for sharing ❤️ I can empathize this feeling of back-and-forth, of uncertainness. I don’t it’s common knowledge, but apparently this uncertainty, this “but I’m not 100% femme!” and “I don’t hate my current body” is apparently common for trans people. The emotional rollercoaster that is this article by Cassie LaBelle helped me through this.
Personally, I try to not rush it. I’ve repressed it long enough, but that doesn’t make it a race, I’d rather try not to trip. Give it a few weeks to see how the feelings towards regarding yourself as a woman develop. Test out what being called Nissa feels like, either in your imagination or by supportive friends / your wife. Don’t worry about it being a commitment, it can stop when you want it to, just like putting on a dress isn’t a commitment.
If it makes you happy and you feel more confident moving forward, you can plan ahead, do some research, and come out on your own terms and schedule.
Reading stories on gender euphoria has helped me to find reassurance in wanting to dare go this path. For me that was mostly transmemes and the book Gender Euphoria.
Thank you for your follow up! It’s so cheerful 🥰