And Catrick said “Mew! Mew! Mewwww!” for the bowl was half empty and he feared his people were soon to starve, but the Lord descended amongst them and in their generosity filled every bowl with a bounty of Tuna and Scallop Feast.

The Lord commanded the cats to scratch not the rug or the furniture, and to only shit in the box in the living room, and in return promised their bowls would never remain empty.

And it was good, until the next day, when this was all forgotten.