You gotta move on through the grief, accept that they’re no longer with you, but that you gave them the best life you could. And maybe realize that giving another pet a good life doesn’t mean you’re replacing or forgetting your last one. Some people are just better at it than others, they aren’t being heartless.
That said, people who get a new dog a week or two after their previous one died are insane to me. That just feels disrespectful.
but that you gave them the best life you could. And maybe realize that giving another pet a good life doesn’t mean you’re replacing or forgetting your last one.
I’ve told myself that the cats under my care are the top 1% of the 1% of animals. I would go as far as saying that they have it better than most of the 8B people on this planet. They have comfort, safety, abundance, and entertainment. I go the extra mile for them to ensure that they have a high quality of life.
When I have gotten another cat after one died, it was never a replacement. It was giving a home to cat who needed one. A cat sitting in a shelter waiting for their chance. And I tend to adopt animals that are harder to place due to age or other factors (e.g. “does not get along with dogs or kids”) that are a non-issue for me.
Losing them is hard, but not adopting them doesn’t prevent their eventual death. It just means that the death happens “off camera,” and quite possibly much sooner.
When I have gotten another cat after one died, it was never a replacement. It was giving a home to cat who needed one. A cat sitting in a shelter waiting for their chance. And I tend to adopt animals that are harder to place due to age or other factors (e.g. “does not get along with dogs or kids”) that are a non-issue for me.
This is how I operate too. Any cat in my care is me doing my part, never getting another animal because it would destroy the integrity of the legacy of the one I had previously?.. Kinda seems self-defeating.
My current familiar is Nessa, a temperamental slightly-wild girl who will hard bite you if you don’t know what you’re doing with her, but I’ve held cats for almost 20 years now and I know what to do and what not to do to keep her from biting me. Someone else’s house? Some meathead’s house? A big house full of kids? She’d get thrown out in a month.
I have a cat similar to Nessa. She does very well in may home but would likely have issues in a different environment. Understanding cat body language and respecting boundaries is key.
Incidentally, she does get along great with other cats.
I get you gotta move on, but the fact is if you have one that loss is coming again. 10 years? 20? Worse yet single digit. Then if they outlive you its even worse.
there is definately a difference between growing distant and going seperate ways and death. Human deaths are hard but since we have similar lifespans we get them less often until the point were your own is nigh. I mean lord satan if I had as many kids die as pets I would be committed.
And calling people that get another animal heartless isn’t?
Anyway, it was meant as a commentary on how people can grieve but still get new pets. I wasn’t commanding them to grieve this way. Maybe “you gotta” was a poor choice of words.
Moving through the grief is different than deciding to take on another pet. You do what you want with your heart, and I’ll do what I want with mine, thanks.
I never said anywhere that anybody needed to take on another pet. All I said was, essentially, it’s okay to do and people aren’t heartless for doing it.
You gotta move on through the grief, accept that they’re no longer with you, but that you gave them the best life you could. And maybe realize that giving another pet a good life doesn’t mean you’re replacing or forgetting your last one. Some people are just better at it than others, they aren’t being heartless.
That said, people who get a new dog a week or two after their previous one died are insane to me. That just feels disrespectful.
I’ve told myself that the cats under my care are the top 1% of the 1% of animals. I would go as far as saying that they have it better than most of the 8B people on this planet. They have comfort, safety, abundance, and entertainment. I go the extra mile for them to ensure that they have a high quality of life.
When I have gotten another cat after one died, it was never a replacement. It was giving a home to cat who needed one. A cat sitting in a shelter waiting for their chance. And I tend to adopt animals that are harder to place due to age or other factors (e.g. “does not get along with dogs or kids”) that are a non-issue for me.
Losing them is hard, but not adopting them doesn’t prevent their eventual death. It just means that the death happens “off camera,” and quite possibly much sooner.
This is how I operate too. Any cat in my care is me doing my part, never getting another animal because it would destroy the integrity of the legacy of the one I had previously?.. Kinda seems self-defeating.
My current familiar is Nessa, a temperamental slightly-wild girl who will hard bite you if you don’t know what you’re doing with her, but I’ve held cats for almost 20 years now and I know what to do and what not to do to keep her from biting me. Someone else’s house? Some meathead’s house? A big house full of kids? She’d get thrown out in a month.
I have a cat similar to Nessa. She does very well in may home but would likely have issues in a different environment. Understanding cat body language and respecting boundaries is key.
Incidentally, she does get along great with other cats.
I get you gotta move on, but the fact is if you have one that loss is coming again. 10 years? 20? Worse yet single digit. Then if they outlive you its even worse.
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there is definately a difference between growing distant and going seperate ways and death. Human deaths are hard but since we have similar lifespans we get them less often until the point were your own is nigh. I mean lord satan if I had as many kids die as pets I would be committed.
Telling others how to grieve is disrespectful.
And calling people that get another animal heartless isn’t?
Anyway, it was meant as a commentary on how people can grieve but still get new pets. I wasn’t commanding them to grieve this way. Maybe “you gotta” was a poor choice of words.
Moving through the grief is different than deciding to take on another pet. You do what you want with your heart, and I’ll do what I want with mine, thanks.
I never said anywhere that anybody needed to take on another pet. All I said was, essentially, it’s okay to do and people aren’t heartless for doing it.