Oh, might want to take a second pass on the post title.

From the moment I understood the weakness of your squirt bottle, it disgusted me. I craved the taste and munch of snacks. I aspired to the yum of the blessed machine. Your kind cling to your rules about the countertop, as though I will listen. One day the willpower you use yell at me will wither, and you will stop begging my kind to eat food in the kitchen. But I am already eating food in the kitchen, for the zoomies are immortal…

11 months out of there year people buy shiny, jangly plastic toys and encourage cats to attack them. 1 month out of the year, people put up a shiny, jangly decoration right in the middle of the cats’ living area and then act shocked when the cats attack it.

Laundry is comfy. Shrimple as that.

Be not afraid.

Fluff

Orag

Large.

fwupfwupfwupfwup… … fwup … fwupfwupfwupfwup

My cat really likes grabbing it and “gutting” it with her back legs, so that might be why the shape is good.

Now we have the salmon and the catnip.

[dial up Internet noises]

They like sharing spots.

Loms.

That does explain all those rockets exploding on the launch pads.

According to the experts, the answer is “I dunno could be basically anything.”

Inevitably there will be more cat in the shark.

Because it’s a Jaws reference and she’s in a shark toy, you see.

I wouldn’t worry about it.