Schwim Dandy

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Joined 3 months ago
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Cake day: March 28th, 2024

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  • A better comparison would be if you had a third arm, or if you were short one arm due to a genetic anomaly or injury. You may feel social pressures that you may not fit in or maybe you feel body dysmorphia about your body being different from other people you identify with. You likely would want to seek care to more closely align your body to one that is socially expected.

    This was very helpful, thank you. I also understand better regarding gender-affirming care. That seems very hard to receive currently, at least in the US. Perhaps it’s being politicized by those in power but I see more comments about not being able to receive any care than I do about successful treatment.


  • If you don’t mind me asking, do you feel the surgeries are necessary to feel as at peace with yourself as you can or do you feel that the steps you’ve taken to this point might suffice in giving you a chance at a happy life? If you feel the surgeries are a necessary step, can you put into words why? Unlike society forcing things on you, it seems at the point of surgery, it has less to do with that and more with changing you for you. I struggle to understand what causes a person to feel that way.

    I’m definitely not asking you to justify your desires and I understand if you’d rather not speak about it to me, I’m just wondering if you can help me understand the necessity of something that seems like such a drastic measure to me. The reason behind it must be very powerful.


  • Thanks very much for taking the time to help.

    However, not every trans person is going neatly from one gender box to another. Maybe they like a few certain things picked up from their assigned gender, maybe they’re nonbinary, maybe they’re gender non-conforming (think of feminine gay men and butch lesbians for examples of cis people like that). Trans people deserve to have at least as much range of gender expression as that!

    This really stuck for me. Straight people really do the exact same thing. We pick and choose how we’d like to be perceived every time we get dressed and go outside. Where (at least in the US) I and my friends grew up getting army stuff for presents, girls got dolls and toy kitchens. The gender training is quite strong from the beginning and I can only imagine how bad one would feel when they get a kitchen for their entire lives and they just want to play with some GI Joe stuff. On top of being shoved into a container you don’t fit into, it seems culturally, we try to punish the people that don’t fit our social container for them.