Stop, stop, you’ve already proven their point

“My my, this old temple is a mess! Who’s going to clean this up?”

Scene cuts to a bunch of kobolds scrubbing the floors and taking out wrecked furniture while happily munching on home-made cookies.

Joke’s on you, Hobbes. I was gonna love you anyway.

I cast BANG

One of my characters I hope to play some day is a half orc hexblade warlock who doesn’t realize he has magic powers or that he made a pact. His “casting” involves yelling intimidatingly and waving his arms, sometimes throwing certain things.

If anyone asks where he got his favorite axe (which is always conveniently “on his back” when he needs it, despite him constantly forgetting it), he’ll explain that he traded part of his shoe for it.

Any party members that try to explain his pact are met with disbelief or confused facial expressions before he inevitably moves on.

I think he’d get Resistance to Poison just for continuity.

You could reward the player by allowing them to find new bodies with different abilities. Later in the game, they could come across a gnomish flying contraption that would grant them a flying speed.

And you know at some point, they could be fighting a stone golem, and the character could deliver the “killing blow” with, “I slam my hat onto the golem and attempt to gain control.”

Mechanically it could work similar to a Warforged character.

Semi-related: I created a gnome subclass in this vein, gnome in a mech. Could be inspiration for anyone wanting to flesh out the mechanics of this.

If they had two attacks, I’d probably allow eating dirt as a substitute for a second attack.

When you live that long, you do lots of stuff.

A dog would never do this

As the owner of a dog that might have dimentia, I can tell you with absolute certainty that a dog would, in fact, do this.

It’s not fully documented, but there are notes on it. It’s called the Empathy Domain, custom for one of the characters on Critical Role season 3.

Matt Mercer basically made a Friendship Domain for clerics, why not a warlock patron? Could have some fun mechanics based on whether the party is together or separated.

Familiar with the cost of full leather garb

The smol found the warm

That’s clearly a dachosaurus. 12/10.

Look, trans folks know more about crossing over than most of us. What’s the problem here?

Yeah, this is the first time in two decades they’ll be out from under the umbrella of corporate bs. I expect they’ll do something cool with it.

See, when you have lots of digital hobbies, you can tuck them away in your Folder of Forgotten Hobbies, which is easier to ignore.

“So, how have things been since our last session?”

"Well, my motivation is definitely not dead, but… I’m not sure it’s completely alive either. I saw a video on my feed about crocheting and I went on a sort of… binge? I’ve never crocheted before in my life, but I kinda made half of an afghan in like 2 days and then got distracted and didn’t finish it. Is my inner will… undead?"

“No, honey, you just have ADHD.”

“Don’t stand in the doorway, don’t block up the hall” – Bob Dylan (context)