What separates the ‘tomboy’ woman from a trans-masc?
One identifies as a woman; the other does not. It’s really that simple.
I find that the less you try to intellectualize gender, the better because it’s something that’s deeply personal to each person. What I view as being a man is undoubtedly different from what you do, yet we both identify as men.
I’ve found that the easiest way to deal with gender is to simply respect other people’s identities because it’s frankly none of my business why anyone identifies the way they do.
I mean, it only makes sense, doesn’t it? You spend so much time thinking about the rules and start to notice things you don’t like, so you decide to tweak things until one day you just went on a three day bender of rules documents and spreadsheets.