Believable. I once passed by a book titled “Common Circumcision Rituals of Orc Clans in the Great Southern Wastes” written by Dr. SpinalfluidHammer, MD. The cover was of the author holding a too-large knife covered in too much blood. He seemed happier than the situation called for.

Woah, woah, keep that thing in its sheath.

You can’t miss.

Any npc I make up on the fly is 100% an orc. I can just put bodily-fluid+weapon together and boom, named.

Oh, him? Yeah, that’s the Orc bartender PissMace.

Lmfao. 55 upvotes, 4 downvotes, and removed by mods. I’ll just restate it for those that didn’t see it. Jesus isn’t real, the Church hates you. Don’t elevate them by sharing poetry to make them seem less the monsters they are. If it makes their life easier, they will walk over your fallen body and they won’t give it a second thought. When they go to sleep at night, they’ll say their prayers and sleep well while repeating the mantra, “Homosexuality is a sin.”

I don’t believe in a “greater good”, I believe that we are all responsible for being the best person that we can be. I think religion is a waste of time, yes. I think the world would be better off without, yes. However, if your religion is harmless, then I don’t care what you do. I only care when your religion is actively harming the world. You can’t be part of a hate group but claim to be part of a love group.

I think the phrase goes, “the road to hell is paved with good intentions.” It doesn’t matter what a person means. It is our actions that define us. You can be as positive as you want to be, but if you preach a message of hatred, all the lollipops in the doctors office can’t make up for the pain you cause. Claiming God’s Love is good when God’s Love means hating doesn’t make God’s Love better. It makes you worse.

When you say that you love me, do you mean it in the God’s Love kinda way? Or the human love kinda way?

Cause God created hell and then told everyone to worship him, and if you don’t, you go to there. He calls that love. I don’t want that kind of love.

To paraphrase Stephen Fry, God gives children bone cancer. I don’t want that kind of love.

God lets those that have unabashed hate for others live in his sanctuary and preach his message. I don’t want that kind of love.

God lets his priests sexually abuse others. I don’t want that kind of love.

God lets wars be carried out in his name. I don’t want that kind of love.

God destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah because of homosexuality. I don’t want that kind of love.

You can talk about Jesus’ teachings all you like, but actions speak louder than words. The Gospel of Christ is the love of an abusive partner. Say one thing, do another. God’s love is a terrible thing, and I want nothing to do with it, and anyone who does is a coward. If, and it’s a big if, if God is real, is he the kind of God you want to worship? Seems like a waste of effort at best, and a complete betrayal of others at worse. So, go ahead, spread his love around. Just remember what kind of love it is you are spreading.

Removed by mod

Too many over the years. I’m long lost.

That’s how they get you, these… cats. Devils more like it. It’s all purring and mewing, and then Bam! one of them hits you with a head nudge. By then, it’s all over. Soon it’s the expensive food, and the water filters, and the fancy kitty litter. Before you know it, they are asking if their brother can crash on the couch. You know, just a for a few weeks. He’s got an idea, and it’s gonna be huge, like Facebook huge, but he just needs a little bit to get him off the ground. A year later you are laying in bed at 4 AM looking back on the choices you’ve made, wondering how it ever got to this point, and you feel a sharp pain in your gut. It’s one of those furry devils come to ask for more food, or to warn you about the spider it thinks it saw in the hallway, or to tell you that the vase above the TV is haunted. It doesn’t matter. You love them, anyway. You’re all theirs now. Under their spell. They call it love, but it’s spelled t-o-x-o-p-l-a-s-m-o-s-i-s.

“Woah! You can’t just cast any spell you find laying around. You have to create a virtual world first, then cast the spell. That way if shit goes pear shaped, you just pull the plug and the world vanishes. Can you imagine if you got a grimoire labeled ‘Summon Frog’, but it actually summoned a plague of frogs? Do you know even who wrote the book? Bro. Virtual World.”

I don’t care what the situation is, I’m taking Bourdain over Fieri any day of the week, but I get the guys point, and Fieri by all accounts is a fucking solid guy.

This is about to happen in the next session we play. They are 100% gonna have a run in with the authorities when they sail into port, and it’s gonna be up to them on how to deal with it. I would love for them to befriend the knights, but I know at best they’ll spend a night in jail, and at worst they’ll be hunted down like stray dogs by every Knight in the city. They’re learning, though. A month ago I wouldn’t even bother brainstorming alternatives, because they’d just fight everyone without thinking and wind up sleeping outside the city, again.

Great Horned Meowl.

I have the opposite problem, my players love to infight about everything. It’s all roleplay, we are great friends and we laugh the entire time, but one of them has assumed the role of Captain of their ship, and barks orders at the other player’s PCs and it just devolves into chaos as the Orc Barbarian and Human Wizard try to interpret the wild and dangerous orders of their Goblin Captain. I haven’t tried it, but I think if I didn’t reign them in, they may go at it all night.

And Trans people aren’t handing out bone cancer to children like candy.

Their eyes are so close together they could be brother and sister.