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Do you also include civilians who are killed by someone else if we don’t take action? While “we” can do better about killing civilians, whoever “we” is, there is a “someone else” who will kill civilians as well - maybe a different group of civilians, but they will themselves do some killing.
Many believe that your so called help for the poor makes things worse for the poor in the long run. You don’t have to agree with their position, but you need to accept that they are reasonable people looking at facts and coming up with a different interpretation.