I grew up in a racist household hearing some truly awful things, and parroted the vile shit I heard from my dad. I was a late teenager before I realized how fucked up my family actually was.
So pardon me if I completely disagree with you that I’m not “less terrible” than I was 30-40 years ago. The person I was back then is long dead.
I just wanted to reinforce my opinion that you can (and I have) absolutely become a better person and left the shitty version of myself behind.
If you’re set on being a better person than you were before, then you’re progressing. There’s a quote attributed to Plato, and I don’t know if he actually said this or not. I think this rings true no matter what though.
“Never discourage anyone who continually makes progress, no matter how slow”
Keep being better and you’ll get through the guilt of who you may have been before. Be a voice for those you may have slighted earlier in life. It gets easier as time goes on, I can promise you it does from personal experience.